Tag Archives: collage cards

Reclaiming Beauty Queen

4 Nov

Beauty Found Collage Card (2011)

Last week we finished up the Fall 2011 Reclaiming Beauty Playshop with a ritual designed to share our Beauty Found stories and commit to self-compassion (being our own Inner Mother). It felt good to come around full circle from our explorations of Original Beauty and Beauty Lost. In honor of Kore’s (and our own) transformation to Persephone, Queen of the Underworld, we ate pomegranate seeds and celebrated the gifts of the Underworld.

I loved engaging in the process with this group. My Beauty Found card incorporated an image of the Queen of Wands from the Thoth Tarot deck. The Queen of Wands represents mastery of Self-Knowledge. Here is what Angeles Arrien says about this symbol in The Tarot Handbook:

The Queen of Wands is the knower of the Self. This symbol represents self-mastery and the process of self-reclamation. Her process of transformation and self-actualization can best be described by the story she represents of a woman who, before she knew who she was, had black hair and walked with a panther by her side. As she began to discover more of who she was, her hair turned brown and the panther changed to a leopard. When she fully realized who she was and began to manifest who she was in the world with her pine cone wand, her hair turned fiery red. At this stage of self-knowledge, she pinched the growth marks of the leopard to prevent it from transforming into a beautiful lion that would have matched her self-knowledge because she wanted a reminder of the dark places from whence she had come (the spots of the leopard). This myth represents the process of self-discovery and the splendor of awakening to the deepest essence of who we are (the radiant crown).

I firmly believe that my time in the Underworld led me to the person I am today. I love how this card honors the dark places we have been in our lives as the fuel for awakening to our essence – a process that for me represents reclaiming connection with our beauty. Included in my image are the words “beautiful strength” to represent the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual strength that is a part of my beauty. I also included a reminder to “be satisfied.” From my study of the Enneagram and learning about my Enneatype, Type 4, the Individualist, I have been able to cultivate mindfulness of the habit of my mind of looking for what is missing. This focus of attention ultimately leads me to dissatisfaction and depression. Through a practice of shifting the focus to the blessings of what is in front of me everyday (without abandoning skills in getting my needs met), I have been able to challenge the perceived emptiness of dissatisfaction. Yay! for self-knowledge to help emancipate (myself) from mental slavery  and celebrate the beauty surrounding me in my life.

I also included the Om symbol to represent the role of my yoga practice in my healing journey.

A shout out to other factors that continue to lead me to Beauty Found:

my husband, son, sisters, parents, friends who mirror my true Self qualities back to me every day ~ making meaning out of my struggles by being a light for others ~ forgiveness of myself and others ~ music ~ the beauty of nature ~ creativity ~ moving towards better health everyday ~ love

What are the “spots of the leopard” in your life that have led you to deeper Self-Knowledge? What/who do you want to honor that has helped lead you on a journey of reclaiming a sense of your own beauty? Create your own Beauty Found collage card and share it with us!

I hope that you will consider joining a Reclaiming Beauty Playshop in the future. The next one will most likely start in February 2012. Stay connected through this blog, on facebook, or through subscribing to the newsletter to keep updated of the latest offerings.

I honor the beauty in you from the beauty in me,

~ Heidi

Remembering Original Beauty

7 Oct

Beauty Lost Collage Card (2011)

The Fall 2011 Reclaiming Beauty Playshop is going strong! This session we are using the myth of Demeter and Persephone to explore Beauty Lost/Beauty Found through Persephone’s fall into the Underworld and eventual rising up as its Queen. We recently did an expressive arts exercise using Collage Cards. One card was to depict our personal fall into the Underworld – our Beauty Lost. The second card was to depict our essence before the fall – the beauty that was part of our childhood innocence – our Original Beauty.

I was glad to have engaged in this process with the group as it helped me deepen my understanding of my own Reclaiming Beauty process. The original Beauty Lost exploratory questions include: “When did you stop singing?” For me, that question goes straight to the heart of my journey because as a musician/songwriter that is exactly what happened to me from losing a sense of my own beauty – I stopped writing songs, stopped playing my guitar, stopped singing. As I depicted in my Collage Card, silence was a way to avoid the pain of the grief, sorrow and suffering from my life experiences.

In 2006, when I was first exploring the Beauty Lost questions, I wrote the following in my journal which I titled “Reclamation Proclamation.” (always have had a flair for the dramatic – it’s part of my original beauty!)

My essence is orange. I know it is. Fiery orange, yellow, red, swirling with aliveness. These questions, even just speaking them, make me feel a sadness in my heart. I think of my dad, my family having breakfast in Rhode Island, during a time where I was feeling very disconnected from who I was. He was looking over at the young girl, about 5 years old, at the table next to us. She was on the edge of her seat, eating voraciously, she could barely sit still she was so in awe of the delight of life. She would let out one burst of glee after another. And my Dad, looked over at this little girl, and looks at me, and says, ‘Heidi, she’s just like you were at that age…’ And tears filled my eyes because at that moment I remembered who I was, and how disconnected I felt from that being inside my heart… I can feel so deeply, and for years I was consumed with only melancholy. A heart-breaking thing, then,  to be reminded of who you truly are, a delight-filled being of joy. The 20′s were a journey for me, and I know at what point in my life I stopped singing. And forgiveness of myself and others will free that delight and creativity. And my baby, by my side, opening myself back up to the flow of creativity that is who I am when I am at my best – the Princess of Wands with the wisdom of the Queen of Wands – that is my what’s happening now. Oh little Heidi… you are still a part of me, and the wisdom of my 30′s, and the groundedness, will be the synthesis, the integration, the Art of my being. 

Original Beauty Collage Card (2011)

my essence is fire, delight filled, delight full, oh… please come out and play

thank you for seeing me, dad, helping me to be and to remember

thank you to yoga for reconnecting me to delight every day

even if you can’t hear it, my heart still sings its’ love songs to life

(2/22/06 – age 30)

What are your experiences with remembering/reconnecting to your Original Beauty? Please comment to join the conversation.

Try the Collage Card process: Beauty Lost and Original Beauty. Then please share them with the Reclaiming Beauty community!

I leave you with a wish/a prayer that my Mom offered me in my Senior Yearbook -

May there always be a song in your heart,

~ Heidi